Thursday, August 23, 2012

A letter to my children.

Following suite with my "reflection" of the people who mean the most to me, I thought I would write a letter to Jenna and a letter to Ashley.   Someday, I hope that when they read this blog (hopefully during their ugly teenage years) they will realize that I really do love them! 


(They grow up so fast!)


Ashley,

The day I took a positive home pregnancy test, after years of trying for you, I loved you.  When Dr. Chang told your father and I that we were having twins, I fell deeper in love with you, and the day that you were born, my heart fell outside of my chest, I finally realized the meaning of true love.  I have wished for you since I was a littel girl, and the only thing in life I have ever wanted to be is a mommy, and a good one.  You light up my life with the contagious smile of yours.  Your laughter makes my heart sing.  You are one of the most caring, loving, beautiful little girls I know and these past 8 years have been the best years of my life.  I can see myself in you, your clumseniess makes me laugh, because I was the exact same way as a child.  I am so proud of the young lady you are growing up to be.  Thank you for being such an easy child to raise.  Please never forget that I have always tried to do the best for you, and I know I will mess up a million times.  That's one of the greatest things about being a mommy, seeing how you forgive easily, your unconditional love proves that. I am so proud of you, you amaze me every single day.  I can't wait to see you continue to grow, and I pray that you will always know how much I love you.  You will always be my little Priss.  I love you more than life. 

Jenna,
You have always been my little figther, since the day you were born.  I remember being at the hospital and praying that you would be ok, because I loved you before I met you.  It took a couple of days before I could hold you, but I would walk down to the nursery and just stare at you, petting you, and rubbing you.  I cried when your daddy finally forced me to take a break from the hospital and go home to shower.  I think that was the fastest shower I have ever taken, and then demanded to be driven back to the hospital, because I couldn't bear the thought of being away from you and Ashley.  That's what happens when you become a mommy, the very thought of missing out on one single second of your life, is unbarable.  I have been wishing for you since I was a littel girl, all I ever wanted to be was a mommy, and I was determined (and still am) to be the very best one I can be!  I am so proud of you, your will to lead and the way you take care of your sister.  You are one of the most caring, loving, and sassy (yes, sassy) girls I know.  The way you question everything, reminds me of myself.  I love your brilliant smile, the way you love to snuggle, and the kisses you give me every morning in the car rider line.  I thank God every single day, that he blessed me with 2 amazing little girls, and still wonder how I got so lucky!  Please don't ever question my love for you, because I will always love you, and nothing you do will ever change that.  You will always be my beans, and I love you more than life.

I wrote Jenna and Ashley both a letter during our stay at the hospital, which I put in their baby books, and will eventually print these out to put in a special place as well.

Of all the things I have done in my life, right or wrong, those 2 are the greatest accomplishments I will ever have.  I love being a mommy, and they make it so easy!

So, now that the tears are flowing (everyone needs a good tear up once in awhile, right?) ha!

Tomorrow, Brent is having oral surgery so if everyone could please keep him your thoughts.  He is terrified!  They are putting him to sleep, so hopefully when he wakes, the pain won't be too bad!!  I figure I will make him a "sick" couch (as my Big Momma always did for us) and we will  have a pajama weekend!! 



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